A conflict of interest

As you may be aware, I have been wrestling with the idea of going back to work (part-time) or staying home to care for Wesley. Even though I was not entirely convinced that I wanted to work yet, I recently applied for a Research Fellow position at one of our universities. The job was fairly straightforward, according to the position description. The usual research stuff, involving qualitative work which I love. The job was 4 days per week, so I was already unsure about taking it on but I figured I'd put an application in anyway. So I was short-listed for an interview. It went very well.

That afternoon I received a phone call from the Director, wanting to ask me a couple of additional questions. One of those questions was: "do you have an opinion on termination of pregnancy?". What the?! That topic had nothing to do with the position description. The research work I was applying for was in a completely different area of research. So, as you may imagine, this question caught me off-guard. I probed a little before I answered, asking "in what context"? It appeared that the Director had other research she was doing that I would be asked to help out in (should I be offered the position). In short, I gave a non-committal answer (such a wuss-bag) ... telling her that I could be professional about any topic and that I keep my personal opinions, personal. This response is quite vague really, but she did not give me a clear description of the nature of work she was talking about, so I was a bit cagey and decided to keep my answer vague. She perceived that I was a little hesitant (she said so) and then preceded to ask me a couple of other questions. I have not heard back from her, so I assume I do not have the job!

I have thought about that phone call a lot since. I am annoyed that she did not describe to me exactly what she was talking about, the exact nature of the research (and annoyed at myself for not probing further). Was the research advocating termination of pregnancy? Was it neutral research, aiming to understand the issue further? I felt I could not fully disclose to her my pro-life stance until I knew where she was coming from. Anyway, today I decided to do a quick 'google' search on her. If I knew then what I know now, I would have been more up-front and told her that I am pro-life (upholding the rights of the unborn child) and I would have told her that it would be a major conflict of interest for me to work on projects related to pro-choice. You see, over thirty years ago, she and her husband set up an abortion clinic here in Australia. She is very active in the pro-choice arena and thus advocates for such things as RU-486 (a pharmaceutical drug a pregnant woman can take up until she is 3 months pregnant to terminate the pregnancy). I was angry. Why was this topic not included in the position description? Why was it such an after-thought for them? Had I known of this association, I would not have bothered to apply for the position. I guess this experience has taught me a number of things, the main one being that I have become more aware of my feelings about such topics.

So there you go. I was simply applying for a job, and found myself faced with a major conflict of interest. It certainly doesn't happen every day, thank goodness!

On a lighter note, throughout this whole process, I decided today that I'm not ready to go back to work yet. I want to be available for Wesley as much as I can. These precious days will go so quickly and I want to enjoy them. Spend time with the baby I longed so much for!